As a parent I am always wondering...have the lessons that I have attempted to impart to my children stuck? I think all parents wonder this same thing. We worry, will they make the right choices when the time comes, will they remember our warnings and "talks".
Today I was given proof that the lessons have stuck and my daughter will make good choices.
We were talking about her friends, as one had just slept over and had indicated a desire to spend more time here. This is a friend she has lost touch with somewhat as they are in different schools this year; I mentioned that I really liked this girl as well as the current "best friend".
Kelsie informed me that her "best friend" (I shall call her S) has been making some bad choices as of late. S has been hanging out with a girl of questionable moral character, one whom I have forbade Kelsie to hang out with. This girl is welcome to come to my home where I can supervise, but she is not to hang out with her elsewhere... so far this girl has never graced my doorstep. S has been going to a boys house while his parents are not home and experimenting with alcohol...not a good equation because the results are sure to be negative. She has a tremendous crush on this boy, this week anyway. She is desperate for a boyfriend and I'm very concerned as to what lengths she will go to have one.
Apparently S has told her parents that she will be sleeping over at F's (the girl of questionable moral fiber) house this evening, when they are going to be sleeping over at the boys house. I should mentions these are FOURTEEN year old kids. WHERE THE HELL ARE THE PARENTS of the boy ????? When kids want to spend the night at my house I make sure I've spoken to the parents to ensure they know where their children are.
My daughter told S that if she was going to be drinking, lying to her parents and making bad choices she no longer wanted to hang out with her. S told Kelsie fine, seemingly uncaring. When Kelsie asked her whether or not she cared that she was losing her best friend S gave a non-committal whatever as an answer.
I feel bad for Kelsie, she is hurt by her friends actions and nonchalant attitude toward her stance. At the same time I am indescribably proud of my daughter. I told her that I am so very proud that she is making good choices, even when it is hard and even when it is "costing" her a friend. She recognizes that S is not a true friend if she is willing to "whatever" away Kelsie's concerns.
As a parent I feel validated, my daughter is doing everything I had hoped she would and more. She is showing remarkable maturity. She is amazing.
I don't by any means think that my child is 100% innocent in all things, or that she is a goody-goody; but by todays standards she runs pretty damn close.
Kelsie I am so very proud of you!! Don't ever stop being true to yourself !