Sunday, July 13, 2008

Beauty and Time Out

Sometimes when the world seems chaotic...when everything around me seems to be in a state of "going to hell in a hand basket", it is hard to find the good. It is hard to see the beauty in what's around me, especially in people.

Sometimes, I get so tired of doing it all on my own, of being single and responsible for everything. Sometimes I feel frightened that I am destined to be alone forever, that there is no one special person for me. Sometimes those feelings threaten to overwhelm me, to take over the usually optimistic person that I am. Sometimes it is hard to remember to breathe.

So this is when I look to nature for my beauty, my serenity peace.

How inviting does this path look? I had seen it many times in my travels to the hospital on the days that I volunteer, and kept thinking how nice it looked. I wondered where it went. So a couple of weeks ago we went.

This is our provincial flower, the Wild Rose. There were tons of them along this path.

And we saw Bluebells, I haven't seen these since I was a child. They were beautiful!!

Then there is always the wonderment of discovery. I love watching kids when they see something new. What is it that they've found? What could it be?

They saw two ants carting the carcass back to the masses. See the green worm? Two wee ants were working together to take him to their colony. The girls were rather disgusted by this find.

There is something calming about the stillness of a pond when viewed through saplings. (This was taken while on a field trip to Ft. Edmonton with my youngest)

I see beauty in storm clouds. They are mysterious in that you never know what they will bring.
Yet, that beauty brings with it a sense of fear because of that unknown.

The end of the day. The stunning beauty of the sun setting.

Fire in the sky.... the colors take your breath away. You can sigh at the completion of another day.

So when the road seems to long and never ending. When things appear to be too tough, or when the weight of the world threatens to suffocate I will make a different choice.

I will choose the path of beauty and discovery. The path of peace and serenity. The path to re-energize, regroup and reconnect.

I will remember to give my troubles up to a higher power. I will remember to take a pause for me. I will remember that I matter too, and that it is important to not lose myself in the hustle and bustle of daily living. I will remember to take five (See the hand in the sky).

1 comment:

Rebecca said...

Wow Jenn, I am in awe. Those pictures are beautiful! Very inspiring. And your words to go along with them are perfect.

I am sorry you feel overwhelmed at times. You are doing an amazing job raising your kids. And if it seems sometimes like no one is there to help, we are bad friends, because I know people care. Forgive me for my thoughtlessness, I care a lot. I need to express it in words more.

I know you are lonely right now with your girls gone, I am sure they miss you too. I loved this post, I will re-read it often.